In Tandem Coaching
Enjoy the Ride!
Cadence, June 2, 2009 
Cadence June 2 2009

 "Cadence" In Tandem Coaching's Newsletter
 Web: http://www.intandemcoaching.com/
 Email: mailto:JoanneH@intandemcoaching.com
 Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/intandem

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Note from Joanne

 Hello!

 As an introvert, I love to read, and I prefer written
 communication over spoken. I’m also a visual learner,
 so I like to write things down, take notes, make
 lists, etc. Despite this, I’m not a prolific writer –
 I would rather read about what others think (since I
 already know what I think).

 Because I would rather write to my audience than speak
 to them (although I am a good, if not excellent,
 public speaker) I’ve started a couple of blogs to help
 build my business. I invite you to visit either (they
 are listed in the Recommendation Zone) and leave a
 comment if you feel so inclined. You will notice some
 overlap with this newsletter, and some original
 content on the blogs as well.

 It takes a while for anyone to find her “blogging
 voice” and this includes me. Please be patient and
 gentle with me as I develop mine.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Feature Article
 Are You Waiting for Permission?

 Introverts need time alone. Note that I stated,
 “need,” not “want.” It’s really necessary for us to
 function at our best. Yet, so many of us struggle with
 finding (or perhaps allowing ourselves) that needed
 time alone. Why do we find this so difficult? I
 believe there are many possible reasons.

 Here are some beliefs and/or behavior that get in the
 way of having as much alone time as you need:

 * Not acknowledging the necessity of some time alone

 * A tendency to over commit because you don’t want to
 appear “lazy”

 * An inability or reluctance to say “No”

 * Identifying solitude as unhealthy or unnatural

 * Fearing others will label you rude, weird, anti-
 social (or worse) if you reveal your preference

 * Believing you have to justify your need before you
 can satisfy it

 * Comparing yourself to others with different social
 needs and thinking something’s wrong with you (hint,
 we’re all different, so please stop comparing)

 * And the biggie (in my opinion): Waiting for
 permission to take time for yourself.

 Are you waiting for permission? In other words, do you
 wait for someone else to approve of how you choose to
 spend your time? Do you feel you have to “explain” or
 apologize for those times you want to spend alone? Do
 you not take time for yourself unless you can think up
 a “good reason” for it?

 I experienced a big “aha” moment once I realized that
 I was waiting for permission from other people before
 I let myself follow my own inclinations. A bigger
 “aha” immediately followed: “There’s no one stopping
 me but me. I’m the one withholding permission from
 myself.”

 Do your introvert self a huge favor and give yourself
 permission to be who you are. This affects some much
 more than allowing yourself the needed alone time –
 but getting your needed alone time consistently is an
 excellent first step to functioning optimally.

 Be forewarned: giving yourself permission will not
 suddenly make extra time appear! If you are a typical
 overworked, over committed, overwhelmed person (and
 who isn’t these days) it will challenge your time
 management skills to fit in that alone time. Whatever
 time management approach you choose, try regarding
 your alone time as a “must have” instead of “nice to
 have” and see if that opens up some opportunities you
 have previously overlooked (or denied yourself).

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Success Made Simple (SMS) Tip

 Instead of asking yourself: “What should I do?” Ask
 yourself “What do I want to do?” Free yourself of your
 “shoulds;” they just weigh you down.

 And while you’re at it, stop judging your “wants.” You
 want what you want, and you were given that want for a
 reason. Sometimes it is wise not to act on all of your
 wants, given your circumstances, but at least
 acknowledge that you have that want, and that’s
 totally OK.

 Aaah, do you feel that burden lifting from your
 shoulders?

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Ask the Coach

 I’ve been enjoying providing suggested solutions to
 your Ask the Coach queries. Let’s keep this up! I
 invite you to submit whatever question is on your
 mind. If I can’t address it, I’ll tell you. All you
 have to do is (figuratively) whisper in my ear. I’m
 listening…

 Click here to Ask the Coach
 mailto:JoanneH@intandemcoaching.com

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Joanne's Hype-Free Recommendation Zone

 Blogs by and/or for introverts (including my own):

 Just Have Fun With It!
 http://overwhelmingsuccess.typepad.com/just_have_fun_w
 ith_it

 Overwhelming Success for Solopreneurs
 http://www.overwhelmingsuccess.com/

 (My two blogs)

 Patricia Weber, Business Sales Coach for Introverts
 http://prostrategies.com/wordpress

 Celebrate Connections
 http://celebrateconnections.blogspot.com/

 Having A Unique Family
 http://uniquefamilylife.blogspot.com/

 (same author, different topics)

 Kristi Cash White
 http://counseling.kristicashwhite.com/index.php/blog

 Rise of the Innerpreneur
 http://www.elasticmind.ca/innerpreneur

 Stepping Stones http://www.wellnessjourneys.com/blog

 Introvert Retreat http://introvertretreat.com/

 Living Introverted http://livingintroverted.com/blog3

 If you are an introvert who blogs and you don’t see
 your blog listed here, I would love to visit your blog
 and check it out. Send me an email with your blog
 link. mailto:JoanneH@intandemcoaching.com

 Cadence grows by "word of email" so please feel free
 to forward this newsletter onto anyone who you think
 might enjoy it.
 http://www.yourtellafriend.com/page/1457/tellafriend

 Thanks so much!

 

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